Getting divorced? Here are some true stories of divorce from the book "You Can Keep the Damn China!' And 824 Other Great Tips on Dealing With Divorce" (Hundreds of Heads Books, www.hundredsofheads.com, $13.95), straight from people who've lived it:

I still have a relationship with my ex-husband. Our boys live with him, and right now we wouldn't have it any other way. He's a wonderful father, and I feel very lucky he has taken that responsibility very seriously. They adore him, and that helps me live via daily phone calls and e-mails to them.

And when I get to see them, I see a reflection of him in them. We talk on a daily basis about our children's lives and how to help or complement them. Together we support the good and bad days for our children. And sometimes, my ex listens when a new "friend" in my life doesn't work out as I had hoped, and he is very supportive without being critical or judgmental about my decisions. I feel lucky.

Anna, Ponte Vedra Beach, Fla., married 10 years, divorced 3 years

My ex and I have a business relationship. This was actually decent advice from a counselor - to treat the continuing relationship like someone you have to be nice to because you work with them even if you don't like them at all.

Barry, Chicago, Ill.

I have no relationship with my ex as he left me for his current girlfriend. He and I were supposed to remain friends and separate everything nicely; however, he cleaned out our house when I was at work. After that, I wanted no relationship at all. Don't get me wrong, I talk to him from time to time, and it is very amicable. But I don't go out of my way.

Jennifer, Philadelphia, Penn., married 5 years, divorced 1 year

We weren't friends in the marriage, so I really didn't expect to be friends afterwards.

Francine Marsden, Vacaville, Calif., married 14 years, divorced 1 year

It just might not be possible to maintain a relationship with your ex-spouse. Right now, my ex-husband and I are in a period of no contact, although I had tried to maintain a cordial relationship. I've had to accept the reality that you can't force another person to keep in contact with you.

Laura Vincent, San Rafael, Calif., married 20 years, divorce pending

I keep in contact with my ex-husband because I am entertained by watching his insane business ventures launch and fail, and think, 'Thank goodness that isn't my money anymore.'

Sarah, Seattle, Wash., married 5 years, divorced 4

IT HAS TAKEN US A LONG TIME to develop a relationship. We've been able to put aside our resentments and be co-parents first. Whenever we have a question about how we should proceed on something that comes up, we say, "What's in the best interest of the kids?" And that's what we do. But I wouldn't say we're friends.